My Grandma’s Legacy
How do you keep writing when your biggest fan is gone?
My grandma died, rather suddenly, a few weeks ago. She was the first and most faithful reader of this blog. Last winter she talked about wanting to help edit the content into a book. She said she had it all outlined and organized in her mind already. Can you see where I got my love of writing?
When I tell my friends and Neil’s family about my grandma’s passing, they’ve said things like, “She was a very special lady” and “I really liked her.” Those close to her knew her faults, too, but she was truly impressive. People tend to brag about the deceased, but I bragged about her while she was still alive, including the post My Financial Heritage: A Mother’s Day Reflection, that I’m so glad I posted when I did.
The short story is that she had many jobs before having three children, then became a special education teacher for children with severe emotional/behavioral difficulties, fostered 17 children, and in retirement became a guardian ad litem, a child’s voice in court. She garnered awards in all her endeavors.
She was also an avid quilter, scrap-booker, reader, and Wizard of Oz afficianado. Her name was Dorothe.
Her financial personality? Spender. She’s the ultimate example of a great person who was not great with money. Fortunately her late husband, a banker, was.
She never gave me money advice, and, in response to my blog, said she wished she’d learned these things sooner. But she did pass on two personal finance lessons:
- If you find a sweater you like that fits well, buy it in every color. (Somehow I never latched onto this.)
- Live generously.
My grandma was extravagantly generous. Generous to a fault. And while her children may literally be faulting her for this as they deal with the messy aftermath of her finances, her generosity remains a powerful example to her naturally stingy first grandchild (that’d be me).
Even in my giving, I want efficiency to rule. I want to give to the most effective, efficient organizations only, and tend not to be very generous to fellow Americans who already have what they need (read: my friends and family). My grandma saw the value of both. And I’m trying to learn to be spontaneously generous to the people around me as I reflect on her habits.
She didn’t leave an inheritance, but she left a legacy. She changed my life far beyond impacting my very existence. She passed her faith on to me and that has transformed me from a sad, stingy person into a joyful, generous one. An invaluable impact.
In essence she spent any inheritance on us while she was alive, and it brought her great joy. It came in the form of frilly dresses and too many toys at Christmas when I was a kid. And in adulthood, it was kitchen gadgets, multi-level-marketing company products, and college fund contributions for my kids. And while I’d only recommend the latter as a solid use of money, my frugal soul has benefited more from these extravagances than it could have from any size inheritance.
Of course, it isn’t an either-or between leading a great life and being good with money. We should all think about leaving our finances in order for our families, whether we want to leave an inheritance or not. There are many good resources available that explain how to manage your assets, what documents to create, and how to organize them for your family. One such resource is found at the end of Dave Ramsey’s The Legacy Journey.
Leave a legacy. Plan for your funeral–not just financially, but relationally and spiritually. “Tell them to do good, to be rich in good deeds, and to be generous and willing to share. In this way they will lay up treasure for themselves as a firm foundation for the coming age, so that they may take hold of the life that is truly life” (1 Timothy 6:18, 19).
What are your thoughts on leaving an inheritance and leaving a legacy?